I had a witty title, but can't remember it now. Habit.

There are habits you get into, when you live with someone for 7 plus years. 
1) I can't sleep on the "other" side of the bed. Even when I share a bed with my sister or something. It's gotta be THAT side.
2) I need something next to me when I sleep at night. Lately I've been setteling for a pillow. :'( Can't wait for it to be a permanent warm body.
3) Calling him "Babe". Boy is that a habit that needs to be broken, 13 years...
4) Not looking at my finances (He handled them)
5) Cooking for an army. I don't cook a lot now, but when I do, I have major cooking portion control issues. :)
6) Consideration. Every time I'm asked to go somewhere, there is a gut instinct to say "wait, I've gotta check first".. thankfully I've never acted on this one yet.
7) Driving down Miller towards my house
8) Just walking into his mothers house
9) The urge to watch our tv shows at night before bed (Rescue Me was/is a great series!)
10) Turning around sometimes, expecting the conversationalist to be there.
*Don't get me wrong, I'm some what lonely. I don't miss HIM per say, I miss the companionship, the routine, the safety and security.

BUT there are habits, you quickly break
1) Saving closet space for him
2) Cleaning.. odd, but yes, my room is littered now.
3) Saving counter space and shower space for him with all my cosmetics, lotions and soaps.
4) How I spend my money
5) Where I go, who I go with and when I go.
6) Feeling guilty about going to church, participating in church activities and tithing
7) Wanting to get my masters, but knowing the sacrifice of time is too much for him.
8) Not exercising because I know he has work to do and can't watch Z
9) Restraining my flirtatious personality
10) Not believing in myself.

AND there are habits that stay the same
1) I'm still a remote hog (when I do watch tv)
2) I still am a dreamer
3) I'm still a wander
4) I still want more kids
5) I still want to be married, or get married as it is
6) I'm still as sarcastic as ever.
7) I still love God
8) I'm still controlling
9) I'm still a smart ass
10) I still go crazy sometimes.

It's interesting to see where life takes you when things change drastically in your life.

The unfortunate thing about this world is that good habits are so much easier to give up than bad ones.  ~Somerset Maugham_____________________________________________
Food time!
Even though I've lost a lot of weight and I have cut back on the quantity I eat, I'm still obsessed with food. I came across this article, describing Foodies. When I read it, I immediately related to it and thought of a few others who did, including: MJ's Take on the World.

Last night, my brother Kha, requested I make Grilled Cheese Sandwiches. I made them once for the kids while my parents were in Vietnam. When my parents heard that request, they were 1) disgusted and 2) laughed at us for talking about how amazing they were. 
So today I headed to Frys and bought some tomato soup (the good kind), Gouda, sharp cheddar, mozzarella, tomatoes, basil, Havarti and Munster cheese. I also purchased sourdough and whole wheat bread. I made random combination of sandwiches but the biggest hits (not surprisingly) were the caprese grilled cheeses: Sourdough bread, Mozzarella cheese, tomatoes and basil. SO DELICIOUS!
 My parents praised me for how good they were. It was nice to see them "eat" their words. 

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3 Things
1) I am so very thankful that my kids were excited to see me today.
2) I am thankful for the time I FORCED myself to spend with God last night. It was so rewarding
3) I am thankful for a car (that although I hate most the time) get's awesome gas mileage. Especially with how crazy I drive.